Being treated like a kink
A plus-size woman is an individual, not a mere object of desire. Yet some people will treat her like one, going on dating apps or seeking her out simply because they want a larger body or want to see what it’s like to be with a plus-size girl. Someone should like you, but not treat you like an object or a fantasy to be fulfilled.
To avoid this, watch out for red flags, like someone talking obsessively about your body rather than your other qualities and your personality. You can also direct questions like “What do you like about me?” If they can only come up with physical traits (especially relating to your size), their intentions may not be the best. Only people who deserve the entirety of who you are as a person deserve your energy and attention. You are more than your curves.
Dealing with dating app algorithms (and catfishes)
Dating as a bigger woman on an app comes with its challenges. Dating app algorithms make it easier for plus-size women to get matches, and if someone doesn’t post a full-size photo that accurately depicts how they look, it can lead to judgment or a negative reaction when you meet in person.
To avoid this, prioritize apps that value body-inclusivity and allow for self-expression, like Feeld, Hinge, and OkCupid. Be authentic, and don’t be afraid to be upfront and state that you’re curvy in your bio, or post a full-body photo that will attract people who appreciate your body type. Don’t hide your beauty—showcase how illuminating you are from the get-go! You can also set up a video call before you meet in person, if that makes you more comfortable.
